Willed Notions.

109^th of Hunter’s Moon, 719

We are making haste back to Thraben.  Tonight will be the last night of full moon for this month, and we cannot spend it on the road.  My newfound ally, Holger, travels with me.  He is a man of some means, having been a master silversmith.  His skills were made useless when he was cursed as a werewolf, and now he has taken residence at Elder Rimheit’s hostel.  She is hoping to find a cure.  Hope is the most dangerous of all human emotions.

Our horses have collapsed, and Holger is busy acquiring fresh ones from the local stable.  He has also given me armor and weapons from his own collection.  Now that he has already accepted his mortality, material objects no longer hold sway over him.  A gift only imminent death can give us.

His plan is simple, yet it will no doubt cost the lives of many Cathars.  Men who have fought beside me in battle, brave and fearsome.  I try to muster guilt over their inevitable deaths, yet I cannot seem to stir my heart.  Perhaps it no longer beats.

I hope to find Jofridus tonight.  As dangerous as hope is, I am more dangerous still.

Raben

Barge Fall Inn.

104^th of Hunter’s Moon, 719

Elder Rimheit has made her case.  Make this right, she says.  I know her life has not been easy, which is why such a reductive viewpoint surprises me so.  It is not as simple as making things right.  It never is.

What would she have me do?  Expose Jofridus for the demon-worshipping traitor that he is?  Grab him by his ear and drag him to the Lunarch himself?  News of this treachery would likely do more damage than good.  If the church’s name were to be sullied, so many innocents would suffer the consequences.  Whether Avacyn is real or not, the idea of her is all that is keeping humanity alive.

She wants justice.  Justice for the church, for Reika, for her poor young daughter Elsi.  I haven’t the heart to tell her the truth; there is no justice.  Nothing can make the death of a little girl right.  No debt can be repaid that will even the balance.  Hang a man, desecrate his corpse, enslave his spirit – will that erase his wrongs? 

Justice exists only as an idea that makes the blind masses feel safe. 

The only true law is that of costs.  Cold, brutal economics.  A man can steal as much bread as he wants, as long as he is willing to pay the price in pain and time.  Murder is not evil, it is merely expensive.

By this account, Jofridus is much in debt.  And soon I will collect.

Raben

Treasurer Kin.

103^rd of Hunter’s Moon, 719

Ereschstag, the town of Elder Rimheit’s parish, was a short ride on a stolen horse.  I never thought I would be chronicling my own crimes, yet once this is over I will gladly hand over the evidence of my sins and pay the price.  It is the only way I can redeem my name.

I found the church easily enough, as a group of pilgrims were marching in slow progression towards it.  I fell in line with them, and walked that lonely walk that is only possible when surrounded by strangers.  Twilight was taking over as the sun lost yet another battle with the moon.

To my surprise, the procession turned just before it was about to ascend the church’s steps, instead filing into a gated opening leading to the catacombs underneath.  A strange custom of Kessig, was all I thought upon entering.

I heard a metal clanking sound ahead of me, and that was when I noticed that the catacombs had been refitted to form some sort of prison.  Stranger still, this sullen congregation had begun locking themselves in, one per cell. 

So much twisted reality had assaulted my brain over the past few days that I can never be sure if I am dreaming or not.  It was then that one of the self-imposed prisoners spoke.

“You don’t belong here.  I suggest you leave – for your own sake!”

Just then I heard the unmistakable sound of stone grinding on stone, and I looked down the ragged hallway to see a heavy door rolling into place.  I started to run, but it was futile.  I would soon learn the nature of this charnel house.

It started as an agonizing scream.  The people in the cells began to twitch and convulse, as gurgling noises permeated the cavern.  The man who had warned me was now staring intently at me, as the body around his eyes began to twist and contort.

The sickly sound of ligament being torn and flesh being stretched was unbearable.  As disgusting as it was, I could not look away.  I watched as the man’s humble form twisted and bent into that of the werewolf.  The screams and gurgles were soon replaced by howls. 

At every cell, clawed hands slashed at the air, intent on flaying the flesh from my bones.  I had fought these creatures before, but only when the numbers favored us.  Now I was but one piece of meat in a hall of hunters.

The jail bars had clearly been reinforced to contain these things, but I did not know if it would contain their strength at being so close to food. 

I found myself kneeling in prayer.  Perhaps I have not lost all of my faith.

In the morning, the guards that rolled the stone door open greeted me with a blow to the head.

Raben

He row slow fleet.

102^nd of Hunter’s Moon, 719

I have found refuge in a small village in Kessig.  I don’t know its name.  I sold the sword Jofridus had made for me, and I have found room and board above a stable.  

It was here that I finally opened Reika’s pack and inspected its contents.  I told myself that I was looking for money, or any item that could aid in my survival, but the truth is that I simply missed her.  Her cloak still smelled of her, like flowers after a rain.  Reika, I failed you so long ago, and only now do I feel the pain of your absence.

Her journal revealed to me a name: Elder Rimheit.  Reika cleary saw her as a mother figure, even though like I she never knew her true roots.  I hope this Rimheit proves to be a true mentor, and not the puppet father I once knew.

Word of my status has not yet reached Kessig, so I must act quickly.  This elder may hear my words differently if she knows I am branded heretic.  But hear my words she must, for Reika’s death cannot go untold.  This woman, whomever she may be, was the closest thing Reika had to a family.  As such, she deserves to mourn Reika as much as I do.  No, I have not earned the right to mourn her yet.

In the morning I shall leave this place and seek out Elder Rimheit.

Raben

Abridge Known.

101^st of Hunter’s Moon, 719

I had thought that my training with the church had lifted me above my criminal upbringing.  Now that I am a fugitive, I have returned to those treacherous ways all too quickly.  Today I have lied, and I have stolen.  We are all fruit that is never very far from the tree.

I fear I must write more of what happened that night in Jofridus’ chambers.  Perhaps a stronger man than I will someday read these words, and he must hear the truth.  I mourn the veil of denial that used to cloak me in its comforting warmth.

After he murdered Reika, Jofridus turned to me with a fervor I had never seen before burning in his eyes.  I was stunned into silence, a shame I carry still.  Reika deserved a better eulogy than that. 

My world was slowly shifting under my feet, I felt as if I could not stand.  My face was wet with tears, and yet a smoldering anger was welling up inside of me.  Jofridus could see it in my face, and he made a move to step between me and Reika’s crumpled body. 

Let her go, he said, let her go and join me.  You can fight for Avacyn for a millennia, for eternity, he said.  He peeled back his vestments to reveal a twisted metal yoke that had burned its way into the flesh around his neck and chest.  I have one for you, he said, all you have to do is take it.  Take it and live forever.

Living for an eternity suddenly seemed like a damnable chore.

No words could find their way across my lips.  I simply turned my back on him.  He shouted for his guards, and declared me heretic.  He said he had proof that I had been worshipping demons underneath the cathedral.  It was this final act of betrayal that left no doubt in my mind that the man I had thought of as my father all these years – the man that had pulled me from the dirt and gave me this life – that man was dead.  In his place was this thing in front of me. 

I realized that there could be no proving my case in Thraben.  The cathedral that I had been named after would be a prison if I was to stay.  I had no choice but to run.  And run is what I have done these past days. 

If there is an Avacyn, may she guide me to justice.

Raben

Eerie Mouth Skit.

101^st of Hunter’s Moon, 719.

Time is not measured by days, but by who we were when it passed us.

I write these words yet I do not know why.  What is the purpose?  All that I know has been an illusion, I have built my house on a pile of stinging salt.

Is this real?  They say the dead dream too.  Perhaps I am dreaming.

If I am dead, then I am haunting these pages with the truth.  If I am alive, the truth will haunt me forever.

Where to begin?  We arrived in Thraben yesterday, and I bade Reika to wait in the narthex while I gave Jofridus the sword.  How strange it is to write his name now.

He touched my brow in blessing, then took the cursed sword and set it on his desk.  I then told him I had far worse news, and that he should hear it from a witness.  I called Reika into Jofridus’ chamber. 

Those were the last minutes of my former life.

She walked through the door, and from the look on her face, I knew that something was terribly wrong.  “YOU!” she shouted, and before I could react, she lunged across the room at Jofridus. 

I expected him to be surprised at this sudden attack, but he looked completely unshaken, as if he expected it.  

“I saw you kill that woman under the cathedral!”  Reika was shaking with anger, as she took Jofridus by the shoulders and began shaking him.  To my astonishment, Jofridus grasped her by the throat and threw her to the ground as if she was made of paper.  How could such an old man display such strength?  I would soon find out.

I made a step to intervene, but it was a step too late.  Reika jumped back up and charged him.  Jofridus calmly removed the sword from its leather wrappings, and thrust it through her belly.

I still do not know if the scream I heard was hers or mine.

I will not write anymore tonight.  I would pray, but I’ve wasted enough breath.

I think I hear them coming.  Perhaps I will let them find me.

Raben

And another?!

I cannot be sure if I am being objective when it comes to Reika.  It is true that she had feelings for me back in our days of training at Elgaud.  I have never admitted before that I had the same feelings.  I only write this now so that my words can be judged alongside the heart that wrote them. 

If I were but a simple thatcher, I could have lived a life with her.

Raben

99^th of Hunter’s Moon, Ava. 719